When I was a diocesan employee, I found myself attending a meeting in a church in Punxatawney, Pennsylvania; a place of some significance today [it's Groundhog Day, if you didn't know or care]. I learned two things that day. One, that the town searches for the most photogenic groundhog to use in the official ceremonies of the day. He is generally referred to as "Media Phil" because for years the actual practice of noting a groundhog's attitude on this day, which is a classic example of American mountain hoodoo, was done with a 'hog on the outskirts of town. That 'hog was not, to be diplomatic, very good looking.
The second was that churches often conspire in their own demise. At a break during the meeting, I asked one of the church members if I could use the phone. He told me the church didn't have one. "People would be bothering us all the time otherwise," he explained.
Update: Oh-oh. It looks like there's some disagreement in the rodent meteorlogical world.